Baby Shower

First ... on a happy note, thank you so much for supporting our journey to become parents. As of now, we only have about 3 more shirts to sell before we meet our new goal. Thank you, thank you, thank you! Not only will our medicine be paid for, but we will also be able to pay for some office visits. You have no idea how much this helps us out! Although infertility is officially labeled as a disease, insurance doesn't pay for one single thing! This is a journey where you feel so alone because no one can truly understand your pain and suffering unless they have been through it, but we feel so loved and supported right now. The fundraiser will not only help pay for this cycle of treatment, but it also made us feel not so alone. So thank you, from the bottom of our hearts for supporting us and for helping to raise infertility awareness. Remember 1 in 8 couples are diagnosed as infertile - it could be affecting someone else you know as well...

Please visit www.booster.com/teambabystone ...


It's been one of those weeks where it seems like when you turn around someone else is pregnant. I've been so emotional lately and I just need to get it out, which is why I created the blog in the first place. So let me start here by saying, there are not many people who are going to understand what I'm about to say. The only people who are truly going to understand are the women who have had infertility problems. This post isn't meant to offend anyone or hurt your feelings, it's simply how I feel. If you think that I'm being selfish then I'm really sorry.

Let me start by saying that after six years of trying to have a baby, you would think that I'm used to the pregnancy announcements and baby showers -- but I'm not. They still hurt -- a lot. This week Ryle found out that two couples we know are pregnant and he was the one to tell me. He gets upset because I get upset. He feels like he's the one making me cry, but I keep telling him - it's better if he tells me than if I find out in front of the people and just break down right there. Both of the women had a hard time conceiving, and I am so happy and beyond thrilled for them that they finally get their miracle baby. But in the back of my mind, I'm thinking "will it ever be my turn"?

Six years. Six long years I've tried to get pregnant. I can't even tell you how many sticks I've peed on, how many blood tests I've had, how many needles have been stuck in my body, etc. Maybe it's selfish of me, but I want it to be my turn. Yes, I know, God has a plan and his plans are bigger than mine. But I just don't want to believe that it's his plan for me to suffer like this forever. How much longer do I have to do this? I know this is hard for most people to understand, but my trying to conceive sisters will understand. Why can't it be me that gets pregnant so easily? When you are growing up as a little girl, you dream about getting married, buying a house, and starting a family. No one tells you that it might not happen for you. They don't tell you that you may not be able to have kids one day ... they don't tell you that all of your dreams might not come true. Do I have the perfect house, perfect husband, and the perfect "fur babies" -- the answer is yes, I do. And maybe it's selfish of me to want more, but I do. I just want to be a mom ...

Today I attended my first baby shower in six years ... yes, six years! I've been avoiding or finding excuses to get out of baby showers for six long years. I wouldn't have gone today, except it was my brother's baby shower. I'm going to have a nephew in about a month. Crazy, it feel likes just yesterday my mom was telling me that he was going to be a dad. I'm almost thirty, but my twenty year old brother will have a baby before me. Life never turns out the way that you thought it would ...


Please visit www.booster.com/teambabystone